She's Been Reading....
There are very few things in this life that give you the thrill, excitement, and naivety of a child. And, candidly, it’s a feeling that I am literally always chasing. There is something so refreshing, so humbling, and so real about the wonder that children inherently have for the world and all there is to explore. This last Wednesday night I babysat for what felt like the first time in ages. And, as I was tucking his little head into bed (30 minutes past bedtime and due to some serious negotiating) I told not one, not two but five bedtime stories all involving bear hunts, edible people, and submarines. As the final treasure hunter was being eaten by an “angry bear” his little eyes fluttered closed and he drifted off to sleep. It was the sweetest moment to witness and further solidified the wonder and joy that children find in fictional stories. Kids somehow embody the perfect mix of curiosity, lack of fear, a nearly constant, inexplicable excitement, and a lack of social boundaries defined by the “should” statements that seem to flood your mind as you get closer and closer to adulthood.
There have been countless times in the last few months when I, myself, have felt like a child. Once, when Lydia was visiting for her birthday back in July and, on a walk by the water watching the sunset, I broke out into dance and song as the tourists passed us by. A few times while I was riding on the subway when groups of performers would play classical music (fully complete with cello and all) somehow managing to bring instruments through the turnstiles. Almost daily I break down into a pool of giggles and silliness when my crush pretends he is an alligator and chomps my arm, or when we compare the muscle size of our biceps. (I read something recently that said the reason you use a “baby voice” or your (very classic, very nasally) pet voice with the ones you love (friends and romantic partners) is because your inner child finds comfort there and, in those moments, it’s a safe space to return to that state of being.)
But, most recently, it’s been through the library and this newfound love for literature. I don’t know what has happened but it’s reignited this passion I have for reading and exploring genres. I lose myself in the storylines and find that my constant revolving door of books holds is even a little too much for the library. Right now I’m averaging a book a week and (if we’re being honest) there have been some weeks where that number has doubled. What can I say? THE GIRL CAN READ!!! I’m thrilled each and every time I walk into the Seward Park Library (ew) and flash my Spiderman library card (ew) at them to check out YET ANOTHER stack of books.
It’s reminding me of the summers I spent with my nose in workbooks (heavily incentivized by the allowance I would get once complete) before I would bike to the small, Ridgway public library to hang out in the YA section with my friends. I learned CPR in that library. I took summer camp in that library. I told my first crush that I liked him in that library. I sold a handmade apron to my old babysitter in a silent auction at that library (it won with the highest bid - give me praise!!). It was at that library that I discovered my passion for the written word and genuinely realized the connective power that reading, and books, have.
My love for writing is in direct correlation with my love for reading. And, until recently, that was a part of me that I hadn’t made the time for. BUT it feels as if my third eye is figuratively opening and the excitement I have when the NYPL (neglects to notify me, but I check it daily) has yet another book for me!
I’ve read 11 books so far this year and I have two more I’m about to pick up. It’s one of the more endearing parts of my day, getting into bed and reading (often with my crush). My love of literature has become contagious and he’s also caught the bug (it’s very cute, it’s very fun, and a top 10 moment).
Tasty Morsels:
WITH all that being said.. here is the list of books I’ve read this year (and my initial thoughts and some honorable mentions):
Breasts and Eggs by Mieko Kawakami - I JUST finished this and it is one of the best books I have EVER read in my life. It is such a lovely, introspective look at a woman’s role in society through various phases of life. 11/10!!
Teenager by Bud Smith - This is on everyone’s list right now.. It was good, but trying a little too hard. It’s very teenage Bonnie and Clyde.
My Brilliant Friend by Elena Ferrante - Fun fact, Elena Ferrante is an anonymous author (this made me love this book even more)! Character development was INSANE and the story is so multilayered. I need to read the rest in this collection.
Pineapple Street by Jenny Jackson - Super fun, very light and easy read. Takes place in Brooklyn Heights so it was very local and cute!
Death Valley Melissa Broder - A book on death, but in a super interesting way. I sent it to Tek and she HATED it, trashed it on good reads, and we had a lovely convo to follow. Send this to your friends only after pure color !!
Pure Color by Sheila Heti - You know my thoughts here.. not my fave but there have been some passages that have lived in my mind since I read it.
Ghosts by Dolly Alderman - I AM OBSESSED!!! I love Dolly! I love this book! It was so great and all about the horrors of modern dating.
The Surrender Experiment by Michael E. Singer - I will never shut up about this and the fact that “surrender” is my word of the year. 11/10!!
Sorrow and Bliss by Meg Mason - Super easy read, very British. Fascinating look at mental health and relationships!
Big Swiss by Jen Beagin - My jaw was dropping every 20 pages. It was so easy to read, pulled me in INSTANTLY and was pretty memorable. Also Anna Weyant did the cover art.
My Body by Emily Rarajkowski - I shouldn’t have read this for a second time only because it doesn’t need to be read twice when you have some behaviors that are easily triggered BUT it is written so nicely and I do appreciate that these stories are out there.
I say this *every* time BUT I will get back into writing again soon.. A lot is going on right now and I’m overwhelmed (but excited!!) but that’s all a story for another time once my brain can fully process all these changes. I do miss writing, and connecting with you all so hopefully, all these words going into my head will soon meet the page and you’ll be bugged by me weekly all over again (: ALSO send me book recs!!!
xoxo, Delaney