Slowing The Fuck Down
Twitter (top tier social media outlet), my hyperactive mind (undiagnosed ADHD) and a wave of inspiration (if you can even call it that) ruined my bedtime, made me puffy and produced this post. Enjoy!
This week was the first week since the birth (if you can call it that) of this newsletter that it has felt even remotely like a “task” for me to write something or even press the “publish” button for that matter. And, that mindset was (and still is) super discouraging to me. As we are all very well aware I love to talk, I love to share my opinions, but most of all I love to think “sooo profoundly” about things and really pinpoint and (attempt to) hyper-analyze the workings of my brain.
If I’m being honest with myself, and all you lovely people & stalkers, I am quite simply overwhelmed at the moment. I am overwhelmed by stillness. I am overwhelmed with plans. I am overwhelmed with the thoughts that consume my brain. I am overwhelmed with certain noises I hear on a daily basis (particularly the pigeon that wakes me up every morning having sex on my AC unit). I am overwhelmed with the buzzing and beeping and ringing of my phone. I am overwhelmed by dating apps (for the most part). And I am overwhelmed by “my” future.
I saw a tweet this week that talked about the concept of “slowmaxxing.” Now, I’m 90% sure this is a fake concept, but nonetheless, I think there is some truth to it and I could most definitely learn a thing or two (or five) from it.
[putting the tweet below before I begin brain dumping]
So, picture me, Monday evening scrolling through my Twitter feed (or as I like to call it, my personal psych ward) and I see this tweet. It quite literally hit me. Took my breath away (an over-dramatic lie and a very lame one at that). I realize that this is SO stupid because there is genuinely no *actual* content in the body of the tweet but the concept at the time seemed so profound to me.
You see, I had just finished the final dinner with my parents on their trip to New York. A trip where I showed them my new home, my “secret” spots, the subway, my favorite corners of the park, my favorite exhibits in museums… These were all good things, all very fun things. But, after they left, I felt guilty. I had made this entire itinerary for their trip and due to weather (and honestly what felt like a million other things that all somewhat came down to me) we didn’t accomplish everything on the “list.” I focused on that aspect and continued to feel bad for myself (and for the situation) until I saw this silly tweet.
Because, in my crazy little mind, I had completely passed over the slow moments. The night that my mom stole balloons from Jajaja and waltzed around the Lower East Side. The many times that my dad took super pixelated photos of me as I shouted “no zooming.” The night where I caught glimpses of my drunken parents as if they were my age running through the rain trying to get to a subway station. The many hours we spent together with Mira, where I was able to watch my worlds collide and all my favorite people forge a relationship. The moments where I sat laughing with the people I love most, spending hours walking around the city, introducing them to my “home”, and just simply enjoying each other’s company. The weather and any other “issue” I thought we had didn’t have the power to take that away. And that’s what I had forgotten, these “slow moments.”
This concept of “slowmaxxing” feels like the tunnel scene in Perks of Being a Wallflower. And I’m sure we’ve all experienced those “tunnel scene” moments before. And, honestly, we probably romanticize them as the memories play on a loop in our minds. As I’ve mentioned before, I am deeply sentimental and there are so many things that mean nothing to anyone else but they’re stuck with me forever (and, I’d like to flatter myself and think the reverse is equally as true). I can’t even begin to tell you the countless playlists I listen to on a weekly basis that are based on this scene in particular. These songs (and these moments) are almost like a temporary escape of sorts from this “overwhelm” that we all face in the speed tunnel (haha get it?) that seems to be life.
I would assume if you inherit this mindset these little slow moments quickly become bigger and bigger as you allow them their space. And then, one day, you’re just slow. You probably don’t even recognize when the “shift” happens because you’re too busy actually enjoying things to pay enough attention. So, why not take a pause every now and then? Why not spend the extra time in the morning making your coffee, stepping outside, or having a planless Saturday? And, being slow, can never be a bad thing in this context because you’re almost just living to let live and releasing the control you *think* you have (speaking to myself here). Ultimately you’re just helping yourself exist in a state of ease, enjoying the natural cadence of moments and the (I’m going to sound pretentious here) “joie de vivre.”
Tasty Morsels:
I’ll be the first to admit that I have a sexy love affair with any good root vegetable. I, unfortunately, have temporarily parted ways with sweet potatoes (if you know me, you know how devastating this is for me) but my latest addiction is raw radishes.
Whoever made this.. we need to have a talk, okay?
S/O to Instagram for always providing the besttt meme content - please text me your results If you haven’t seen the last slide on my latest Instagram post, I am taking this time to explain it to you. My parents and I were minding our business eating gluten-free bagels in Central Park when my dad spots a NAKED MAN sunbathing in the grass surrounded by mommy and me classes. Truly a beautiful moment and I can only hope to one day have his confidence.
CHILLLLLS from this TikTok. All I’ve wanted in life is to be musically talented, it’ll never happen but a girl can dream!
To the gays, girls, and theys - if you want to look extra kissable this summer, use the Tower28 Lip Gloss. I can confirm from multiple sources that it is *chef’s kiss* (no pun intended).
The editor of Sex Diaries in NY Mag, Alyssa Shelatsky, wrote a new book!! I have been a long-time fan of the column (especially the content) and the delivery of the stories. Jenny Mollen (one of my fave crazy IG Moms and author of a GREAT book - Live Fast, Die Hot) just gave it rave reviews, so now I MUST get my hands on it. AND the PR boxes have been sent out fully inclusive of a Maude vibe, skinny pop popcorn, and Charlotte Tilbury highlighter (iconic assortment if you ask me).
I’m leaning into my egg-shaped head and WILL be wearing a slicked-back pony all summer long. And pigtail braids... They’re too cute guys, I cannot not wear them! TODDLER CHIC!
Yesterday, I learned that “ma petit chou” in French means “my little cabbage.” It’s a cute little term of endearment and is now my favorite of all the obscure pet names.
Open Poll: Would I be a different person with a spray tan? AND on a scale of 1-10 how ridiculous would I look if I didn’t appear vitamin deficient?
That’s it for me, folks. And, let’s not forget to give a warm welcome to the men who have found this newsletter after stalking me online, join the party (you’re sooo very welcome) <3
Xoxo, Delaney
For not wanting to write this, it’s great! Brought a smile to my face to think of our trip and how epic it was! Love you and NYC!